Before you fill anything in
A template only works if you bring real material to it. Spend ten minutes answering these out loud before you write a word — whatever comes to mind fastest is usually your best line.
- What is one small thing your sister did as a kid that still sums her up?
- What do you see in her that people meeting her today might miss?
- When did you stop worrying about her — or start being glad someone was looking out for her?
- What did you notice the first time you saw her with her partner?
The template
Section 1 — The opening story (about 45 words)
Open inside one moment from when you were kids. Do not introduce yourself first — the picture earns the room's attention, then your name arrives.
Opening — fill in
About 45 words · 20 seconds
[ONE PRECISE CHILDHOOD SCENE: an age, a place, a thing she did.] When [SISTER'S NAME] was ____, she ____________________.
Then, and only then: I'm [YOUR NAME], [SISTER'S NAME]'s [older / younger] brother.
Section 2 — Who she is (about 130 words)
The sibling's-eye view — the part nobody else in the room can give. Show one trait through two or three quick, specific examples rather than a list of adjectives.
Who she is — fill in
About 130 words · 55 seconds
[NAME THE ONE TRAIT YOU KNOW BETTER THAN ANYONE.] The thing about my sister is that she ____________________.
[EXAMPLE ONE — small and exact.] ____________________
[EXAMPLE TWO — from a different part of her life.] ____________________
[THE LINE THAT SUMS IT UP.] That is [SISTER'S NAME] entirely — she has always ____________________.
Section 3 — The protective turn (about 90 words)
Let a protective streak show as warmth. Admit you once worried, or that you had a "stern brother" speech ready — then retire it. Never point a warning at her partner; the feeling is care for her, not a threat to them.
Protective turn — fill in
About 90 words · 40 seconds
[THE HONEST WORRY, KEPT GENTLE.] For a long time I ____________________, because ____________________.
[HOW THAT CHANGED WHEN THE PARTNER ARRIVED.] And then she brought [PARTNER'S NAME] home, and ____________________.
Section 4 — Welcoming her partner (about 90 words)
Address the partner by name and directly. One thing you noticed the first time, then a genuine welcome into the family as a new sibling. This is the section both families listen hardest for.
Welcome — fill in
About 90 words · 40 seconds
[PARTNER'S NAME] — [THE FIRST SPECIFIC THING YOU NOTICED ABOUT THEM WITH YOUR SISTER]. ____________________
And that is when I understood. Welcome to the family — [YOU HAVE A BROTHER / A SISTER / A BROTHER IN ME] now.
Section 5 — The close and toast (about 80 words)
No jokes past this point. Say the thing you would find slightly embarrassing to say to her face — that is reliably the right line — then raise the toast and stop.
Close and toast — fill in
About 80 words · 35 seconds
[SISTER'S NAME], you have ____________________ for as long as I can remember, and ____________________.
Everyone, please raise your glasses. To [SISTER'S NAME] and [PARTNER'S NAME].
(Wait for the room to actually lift their glasses before you say the names, and do not add anything after them.)
After you have filled it in
- Read it aloud with a timer, standing up. Target two to four minutes.
- If you are over, cut an example from Section 2 rather than trimming every line evenly.
- Delete any "if you ever hurt her" line, any teenage embarrassment, and any mention of an ex. There are no exceptions.
- Check that Section 4 names her partner and genuinely welcomes them — siblings skip it more than any other part.
- Print at 16pt on one side of paper, not a phone, and read it aloud twice more on two different days.