The template
Section 1 — The host welcome (about 70 words)
Thirty seconds. Name your daughter's new in-laws directly — it costs eight seconds and it is what their side of the room will remember.
Welcome — fill in
About 70 words · 30 seconds
Good evening, everyone. I'm [YOUR NAME], [DAUGHTER]'s father.
Thank you all for coming, some of you [ONE SPECIFIC DETAIL — from a long way, with a broken foot, at short notice].
And to [PARTNER]'s parents, [NAME] and [NAME] — thank you for [SOMETHING REAL, NOT A FORMULA: the welcome you have given our daughter].
Section 2 — The childhood story (about 170 words)
One story with an age, a place and something she said or did. This is the section everyone came for — do not compress it in favour of more material.
Childhood story — fill in
About 170 words · 70 seconds
When [DAUGHTER] was [AGE], she [THE THING SHE DID]. ____________________
[THE DETAIL THAT PROVES IT HAPPENED — an object, a number, a quote.] ____________________
[WHAT YOU DID, OR WHAT YOU THOUGHT AT THE TIME.] ____________________
Section 3 — Who she became (about 90 words)
The bridge — fill in
About 90 words · 40 seconds
She has been like that ever since. [ONE ADULT EXAMPLE OF THE SAME TRAIT.] ____________________
[SOMETHING SHE BUILT WITHOUT YOU.] ____________________
Section 4 — The verdict on her partner (about 110 words)
The emotional centre. Address them by name. Describe the moment you knew — it is almost always small and domestic rather than dramatic.
The verdict — fill in
About 110 words · 50 seconds
[PARTNER'S NAME]. [THE FIRST TIME YOU MET, OR THE MOMENT YOU KNEW.] ____________________
I noticed, and I did not say anything about it for [HOW LONG], and I have never forgotten it.
[WHAT YOU WERE AFRAID OF, AND THE FACT THEY HAVE NEVER DONE IT.] ____________________
Section 5 — Blessing and toast (about 90 words)
A blessing, not advice. Write these lines out in full — emotion takes your improvisation first.
Blessing — fill in
About 90 words · 45 seconds
[DAUGHTER], you have never needed ____________________. You have it anyway, and everything else, always.
Ladies and gentlemen — please stand if you are able, and raise your glasses. To [DAUGHTER] and [PARTNER].
Do not include
- Jokes about the cost of the wedding.
- "I'm not losing a daughter", "giving her away", "she's your problem now".
- Marriage advice framed as instruction.
- Anything about grandchildren.
- More than one sentence about your own marriage.